Pornography
What is pornography?
Pornography, or porn, is a video, picture or story made to make someone feel sexually excited. Porn is made for adults and does not show what sex and relationships are really like. It is often based on fantasy.
It is normal to be curious about sex as you get older. You may want to learn more or explore your feelings.
Porn can affect how you think about sex, your body and relationships. It is important to understand that what you see in porn may not be safe, healthy or realistic.
There are also laws about young people and porn. It is illegal for someone to show porn to a child or give them access to it.
Pornography can be dangerous because it changes how people think about sex and relationships. It often shows fake bodies and fake behaviour, which can create unhealthy expectations. Some people begin to see others as objects instead of real human beings with feelings. Over time, frequent use can lead to addiction, making it hard to stop even when it causes problems. It can affect mental health, causing anxiety, shame, or loneliness.
Pornography can also hurt real relationships by reducing trust and intimacy.
Learning about respect, consent, and real connection is safer and healthier than learning from porn.
Pornography is made for adults (aged 18 and over). If you choose to use it, do so with care. You should:
- pick legal sites that respect consent and age rules
- protect your privacy with strong passwords and secure devices
- set time limits so it does not replace sleep, work or relationships
- remember that porn is acting, not real life. Bodies, sex, and reactions are often exaggerated
- do not pressure partners to copy what you see
- take a break and talk to someone you trust or a professional if you feel shame, stress, or loss of control
You should not feel worried or ashamed if you are curious about watching pornography. However, there are some circumstances when porn is illegal, these include:
- showing someone porn or giving them access to porn when they are under the age of 16
- porn which uses videos or images of someone under the age of 18 doing something sexual, including sexting
- porn that includes scenes of rape, pretend or otherwise
- images or videos that depict sexual acts with animals or dead people
- anything that might put someone's life in danger or risk physically hurting someone
Some porn is made to be shocking so that more people will watch it. This can include harmful or violent behaviour.
Most harmful behaviour shown in porn is aimed at women, girls and people with a cervix. This does not show what healthy sex or relationships are like. Watching this type of content can give you an unrealistic idea of how to treat other people.
Disrespectful behaviour can also happen in real life. This can include sharing someone's 'nudes' without their permission, sometimes called revenge porn.
Porn should not be used to learn about sex. It does not show what sex is really like.
Some porn shows harmful behaviour, such as violence, sex without consent or behaviour that humiliates or hurts someone. These things can cause physical and emotional harm.
Watching porn that shows aggressive or harmful behaviour can give you the wrong idea about sex. It may make it harder to understand what is safe, respectful and consensual in a healthy relationship.
Addictions are when you feel like you can not stop doing something. Unlike drug abuse, porn addiction is a behavioural addiction, meaning that you do not have physical withdrawal symptoms, but you could:
- feel strong urges to watch porn regularly
- spend a lot of time thinking about porn
- do not feel in control of the amount of porn you watch
- notice it affects how you feel during sex in real life
Addiction can happen to anyone, and support is available. Sometimes, people may use porn to cope with difficult feelings or sensory needs.
Talking to someone can help. Counselling and therapy can help you understand your thoughts and behaviour and find ways to make changes.
Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is one type of talking therapy that can help with addiction.
