Loneliness
What is loneliness?
Loneliness is the feeling of being emotionally alone, even when other people are around. It happens when we want connection, understanding, or closeness, but feel we are not getting it. You can feel lonely in a crowd, at school, at work, or at home. Loneliness is not the same as being by yourself. Being alone can be peaceful and chosen, while loneliness often feels heavy and unwanted.
Loneliness can make people feel sad, tired, or as if they are invisible. It can affect how we think about ourselves, sometimes making us feel unimportant or misunderstood. Many people feel lonely at different times in life, especially during big changes.
There are many different causes of loneliness, and they can vary for different people. It can sometimes be hard to understand what it is about an event or situation that makes us feel lonely.
Some common examples of causes of loneliness are:
- moving to a new area where you don’t know anyone
- experiencing a bereavement
- retirement
- becoming a parent
- experiencing mental health difficulties
- changing school, starting university or starting a new job
- going through a relationship break-up or arguing with a friend
Some people might be more vulnerable to loneliness than others. For example, if you:
- have no friends or family, or are separated from your family
- have experienced sexual or physical abuse, which might affect your ability to form close relationships with other people
- belong to a minority group and live in an area where there are few people from a similar background
- have mobility problems and are not able to attend social activities
- are discriminated against because of a disability, mental health problem, or because of your gender or race
- are a single parent or carer, and it affects your social life
You could try:
- talking to a friend, family member or trusted person about your concerns
- joining a group, class or sporting activity that you enjoy to meet like-minded people
- volunteering to help at a local charity
- owning a pet, as this might provide some emotional comfort and connection. You should only get a pet if you are able to look after it properly
- going for a walk with a friend or family member could provide a good opportunity to talk about how you are feeling
